Crack is my favorite type of fic to write, and my favorite type of fic to read. This morning, after following a rec on the K-B community LJ, I read here’s another tuesday morning email by notallargon, which is definitely worth a read.
Here’s the summary:
In which Kurt is exiled from Heaven for suggesting that Jesus shaves off his iconic beard, works in an IT department and e-mails Blaine constantly because what else is there to do?
Yup. You read that right.
I’m having flashbacks to an old mentor of mine who, when reading a play I wrote about a dead man living in a tent in his wife’s backyard said, “I hate angel plays.” Her supportive critique has stayed with me all these years, and perhaps clouded my judgment about stories featuring angels (though I stand by my assessment of Ghost, Whoopi Goldberg notwithstanding).
So you can understand why I was reticent to read this crack fic, let alone like it. Still, crack fics are like, well, crack to me. So I had to do it. And let me tell you, I’ll be riding off the high of this fic for days. So. Damn. Funny.
so in “Extraordinary Merry Christmas” they cut:
- a scene between the gay couple where they mention they had sex, talk about getting married, confess their love for one another, and one of them pretty much does a dry run of his wedding vows PLUS multiple little overtly romantic and physical moments
- a moment between the couple where both of them are Asian
- a cheek kiss between the lesbian couple
- a conversation about the interracial couple
- multiple repetitive scenes with the straight white couple
- a promotion of an organization known to be homophobic
I’m sensing a pattern here.
"…Also, you find Kurt and Blaine cute, so that automatically makes you a good gay."
- so it’s just like when harry met sally, but i get to play meg ryan.
- deal. don’t they get together in the end?
- kurt, there is… a moment when you say to yourself: oh, there you are. i’ve been looking for you forever.
- married by thirty. legally!
- blaine and i are like an old married couple. a fabulous old married couple, like paul newman and joanne woodward.
- you are the love of my life, kurt.
- do you want to know how i picture the end of my life? just like in the notebook. i’m sitting in a nursing home talking endlessly about my high school sweetheart. my first love. going on and on about every little detail as if they matter. only, in my version, he’s there with me, telling me to shut up so he can finish the american cinematheque salute to j.lo.